Life Goes On: Day #10 Hospital

Chhavi Agrawal
5 min readMay 20, 2021

--

Day #30 of symptoms

With a snap it brings you to ease,
that sudden, eerie, release.
In death there is peace. In death there’s is peace…

My second roommate, the old lady, too passed away yesterday, merely within a few hours of the old man’s death. She had been partially paralyzed, and her family had been trying to cheer her up on video calls since day one I got shifted to this room. Sadly, some of them just managed to reach the hospital (their home was far) yesterday to see her but by then it was too late.

The Portable Curtain

Her body remained there on her bed, few inches next to mine, feebly separated by a portable curtain that the staff had put to insulate the poor girl (me) from the second death in a row of that little room. While members were visiting, crying, complaining, and staff was figuring out logistics, I was time and again being asked to just keep resting and not worry. A kind guy even gently threw in a towel on my eyes to cover them, tucked me in the blanket, treating me like a 5 yr old kid. But there was oddly a nice warmth in the gesture. So I embraced it.

I wasn’t worried, just a little numb. But it settled in. Moreover, unfortunately or thankfully, I had again been on that strong diuretic pill during all this while, so it was kind of a very awkward balance I was maintaining as to when’s the next right moment of window to call for my next batch of pee. It kept me occupied enough, mentally.

UPDATES

A new friend
  • Murphy’s Law. I’m not a fan of it. But, sometimes it’s too much in your face to ignore. My periods just started. Yes, as I said, life goes on. And the timing? My body has just now done flushing out last ounce of stored bodily fluids (3 back to back days of a diuretic pill), majorly dehydrated, with a history of painful periods, ongoing weakness, known extremes of PMS bouts and right when I was trying to set a bio rhythm, have new chores to look into too. That’s alright. Just a mini rant. Will be managed.
  • But yes, today’s morning has been debilitating so far but only because of these reasons. Otherwise I’m doing well.
  • Due to my increasing nasal irritation and bleeding, I’m off nasal cannula and now on a new simpler oxygen mask. Maintaining well at 4–5 LPM easily, breathing feels much better today.
New & Simpler Oxygen Mask
  • I got my Chest CT scan done yesterday, waiting for the results to see what’s actually going on in the lungs now.
  • Some other routine tests were also ordered, hoping no major shocks will come back there
  • Overall progress wise doctors were not unhappy, but were genuinely curious, that what’s taking her so long. Things seem fine on the outside (that’s how I deceive :D) So, waiting and watching

QUICK BACKGROUND

  • Though this is just the 10th day (never thought I’d use ‘just’ for 10 days at a hospital), my first symptom had developed on 21, April 21. And, I had, for all visible, practical purposes, recovered well within 8–10 days at home itself.
  • It was until very late when my fevers started spiking again and some discomfort started reappearing when things took a different turn

NOT JUST COVID — MY CURIOUS CASE

For those of you who don’t know about my medical history, here’s a quick refresher. I had been diagnosed with a very rare representation of an already very rare autoimmune disorder, Wegeners Granulomatosis. Owing to which I had been on long term immunosuppression, mini chemo, and multiple other long term biosimilar treatments.

But, that said, it all has been in miraculous remission since 2019, and I have been off meds (the doctors had very well acknowledged that the way they hadn’t seen such a case, they hadn’t seen such a recovery either. So, you see, you I have done it before, I can pull it off again)

The only thing now, keeping doctors alert and demanding patience from all of us is that, the body’s fundamental machinery might take time to recover as they honestly don’t know what’s it that goes on within me :D (those 2016–19 stories for some other time)

And then this is Covid — with which the whole freaking world is right now clueless :D So here we’re focusing on one step at a time, fixing things, monitoring progress, and carefully observing everything that’s happening within.

HOUSEKEEPING ITEMS

  • At least, I could get a chance to enjoy one peaceful, dinner yesterday… alone in the room. With constant spattering of rain on the far left window, shining against the two freshly made beds…
The two freshly made beds
  • Now, I have again been shifted, to a new room (it’s the 3rd room since I moved in). The sudden exodus in that room had made way for a family to be admitted together. So I was immediately transported. I’m honestly relieved to have left that room myself.
  • I’m now in a much cozier room, with 2 female roommates this time. I’m in the middle. One is roughly my age, and the other is perhaps in late 40’s. Well on the path to recovery, perhaps soon to be discharged.
  • Accessibility and comfort wise, this middle bed is much better. And, the energies of this room are conspicuously lighter and softer and warmer.
  • The staff knows me by now, and is now talking oftener (is it because recent sympathy or what I don’t know but I can feel the difference)

TRIVIA

  • I got my fourth cannula changed yesterday in 10 days. All due to random reasons. This time, it was literally leaking from the other side of the vein, so medicine was simply entering from the front, and leaking from the other side. Now my right hand has the new cannula, so I’m mostly left hand swiping.

SPECIAL MENTIONS

  • Special thanks to Abhishek, for compiling, my posts on the blog, and making sense of my misspelt, haphazardly swiped words. And, also volunteering to manage the blog updates end to end, as more and more people keep asking me for updates.
  • Thanks to my sister Lipi, who’s constantly keeping everyone in loop too, insulating me from deluge of messages
  • Mom Dad, of course for providing each and every support at the drop of a hat. Btw, thanking family always feels such a weird understatement. You can ignore this point.

Today’s was an effort to write, but definitely making me feel so so so lighter and better!

Love you all!

--

--

Chhavi Agrawal
Chhavi Agrawal

No responses yet